Saturday, April 25, 2009
Soon I'll make you my wife so that we can live a better life that includes you & me & we & us, all inclusive package deal, a never ending paradise.
Lets wait awhile until we do this, until I save this or until I do that. Only lead to just one more year you'll be here sooner than you think, Which turned into what about spring & then we'll do our thing.
Now I'm broken hearted by what we started. A close but not to close, I'm here & you're there long distance loving. We use to talk everyday & now it seems you don't want to look my way.
What happened to us? where is the love you said you give to me that would make us the we, that we said we would be. Now your vision is clouded by thoughts and actions you share only with your self, never telling me whats wrong or giving me the courtesy to make it right.
Now you bring someone else to take my place. Yet you tell her and you tell me lies upon lies upon lies to try and cover up the flies that hover around the bullsh*t that you've dished out. You thought I'd never find out, you thought you had it all planned out, you thought I'd never talk to her, you thought you found a way out.
I gave you love, honesty, fidelity, trust, forgivness and most of all me. Never will I say I was the perfect one, but at least I can admit my mistakes and stand up for my faults. I still love you, that will always be true and maybe down the road we'll meet again as a better you and a better me so we can be what I pray God wants us to be a better we.
I love you James Alex
Friday, April 24, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Today I wanted to touch on a life issue that most of us have all or will deal with in our lifetime. Relationships are nice to have and requires a certain amount of work from both parties involved. Without dedication and work from both parties the relationship will ultimately fail. Most think well in a relationship everything needs to be 50/50, straight down the middle, and that is what I call wishful thinking. In every relationship there will be someone who does more than the other in one way or another. Someone may contribute more money than the other, or someone may show more affection than the other. Giving more or less is not wrong if the one who is giving more doesn't have a problem with the other giving less and vice versa.
In order to make a relationship work there are a few things that you must do as a couple. I'm not speaking in terms of just someone you're casually dating, but someone who your making plans to spend your life with or you are spending your life with. I'm a christian so I'll be coming from a christian way of living and even if you're not a christian some of these must do's can apply to you to.
Relationship Must Do's
1. Pray without ceasing, pray together, & pray for each other
I don't care what religion you follow most of them require you to pray/meditate or whatever you may call it. Prayer allows you to make a petition to God for your needs, it's your spiritual phone line between you and God. Say a prayer of thanks everyday when things a right and when things are bad. Praying together brings you and your counterpart closer together. Nothing is more intimate and beautiful than the two of you praying together and for each other. When my mate prays for me it puts a smile on my face because I know he cares & he's going to God humbly without any tough I'm a man stereotypes and he's showing his vulnerable side. If you don't pray together now is the time to do so.
2. Communicate Often
If you don't communicate with your spouse, fiancee, bf or gf. The relationship will not last. Someone will be hurt in the long run about something you or your counterpart didn't say. Never hold in your feelings take time to sit down and talk about the issues each one has in a loving way, never attack the other person.
3. Love Unconditionally
Everyday I tell my boyfriend that I love him & I need him. Not because I'm just all emotional and needy because he needs to hear that come from my mouth and see it in my actions. My love for him comes with no strings attached, meaning I don't love him because of what things he can buy me, what bills he can pay of mine, or what places he can take me. I love him because he adds to my life, he puts balance in my life where I'm unbalanced, he knows how to calm me down, he loves the Lord, he knows how to make me smile, I don't have to hide my true self with him.
4. Fight Fair
Everyday is not peaches & cream and sunny dreams in a relationship. One way or the other you will piss each other off and some problems will be more tough than others, but fight fair.
Never try to fix a problem when you're really mad. I know some of you are like are you serious, but if you are mad and trying to fix a problem your decision making can be distorted by what you're mad about. Take some time to think about the issue and come back, sit down and talk it out. When you're mad you'll say something you don't mean.
Never call names... how can you love and respect someone and call them names!! That's not right at all.
Never hold a person for emotional ransom or blackmail.. What are you talking about MoZaic!!!! What I mean by this is never hold a persons past faults against them. I'm talking about the.... If you loved me you would or wouldn't have done this...If you would or wouldn't have done this then....you don't even have this or that... you still live with yo momma or daddy...if you was a real man/woman then this or that...I'm gonna tell everybody about how you did this or that to me...
Again, how can you play with the emotions and feelings of the person you love. You wouldn't want every time something goes wrong or you try to do something positive and your past issues and faults are brought up against you.
5. Have a forgiving heart
We all make mistakes in our lives and some where someone had to forgive us for what we did. The reason for this post is because of a situation I need to forgive my boyfriend of 4 years about, that for most is unforgivable. Forgiveness starts with obtaining forgiveness with God by repenting for your mistakes. After asking God to forgive you then you must forgive yourself, then forgive the other person. No matter if you're right or wrong.
Forgiveness is not for the other person per-se it really is for you. If you don't forgive a person and every time you see them you get all mad, your stomach clinches, and in your all OOOOOOOHHHHH I can't stand them in your mind. Yet, the person you can't stand can't feel your pain. Why waste your energy on holding a grudge against someone who has probably moved on from the issue. Un-forgiveness will keep you from going to heaven and you step outside of the will of God. I forgive my future husband, we've had some arguments, but this issue takes the cake. It's never been this bad for us and I believe the enemy is just trying to separate us because we are so close to being married. There is not a devil in hell that will keep what God has put together from happening unless we give the enemy room.
Love with all of your heart, but don't let love cloud reality. If there is something wrong in your relationship deal with it and try to work it out and if that doesn't work seek Godly counsel from your pastor, leader, mother in the church, or a seasoned saint who is married. I know your girls got your back, your momma got your back, but sometimes they are not the right people to confide in and their answer may be bias. Never try to just fully go it alone. You need someone who in your corner you can go to when you have a problem.
I Love you Jay
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Sorry for the break in post I've been working like crazy. I tried the baggy method yall and guess what It works pretty good!!
For those who don't know what the baggy method is. It's a process to help your hair retain moisture and avoid breakage and split ends. Most people just use it for their ends by bagging their ponytail but my hair is short so I bagged my entire head.
To get started 1st your pick you favorite leave-in conditioner and put just enough in your hair or on your ponytail for those who want to just do their ends.
After applying the conditioner to your hair seal the ends by using a good oil. I used EVOO (Extra Virgin Olive Oil)to seal my hair.
After applying the oil place the shower cap on your head and wrap your head in your silk/satin scarf or bonnet. When I put my shower cap on I secured it with a head band because I know how I sleep and they I tied my satin scarf.
When I woke in the morning I took the scarf and cap off and my hair was very moist. It wasn't dripping but it was wet and that's because I bagged my entire head.
I picked my fro out and went to work. My hair stayed soft and manageable all day I'm very impressed by this method. Although; I will be putting in less conditioner this time to adjust the amount of moistness I have in the morning.
I'll post pictures tomorrow of when I baggy my hair tonight and the results.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Here is a news story on going natural, being professional and natural hair, working out with natural hair, and the health benefits of having natural hair. I was a little surprised when I saw this video on My Fox Chicago news. This is a good step towards help others see the benefits of natural hair.
Friday, April 10, 2009
The next thing on the agenda.....Detangling your hair. Hair washing day is one of my favorite days until I have to detangle my hair. It's easier since I did my big chop and my hair is fairly short. Yet, it's still a task at best!! There are really just three things that you need when it comes to detangling. 1. a wide tooth comb 2. Conditioner and 3. Patience.
The Wide Tooth Comb
The wide tooth comb comes in a variety of sizes, colors, types, and is made out of either plastic or wood. I have that exact comb pictured above I use it everyday to manage my kinky curlies. Unlike smaller tooth combs this comb will almost glide through your hair without pulling your delicate strands out of your head.
Conditioner will make your hair easy to comb when your detangling your hair and that mean less breakage and manageable hair. The conditioner provides a slip so your hair just slides through the comb.
How to detangle
I typically wash my hair in the shower. It's just easier to detangle in the shower versus hanging my head over a sink. Here are a somes steps to consider when detagling your hair...
- For long hair part your hair in sections when you wash and condition
- Apply a generous amount of conditioner to each section
- Slowly detangle each conditioner soaked section with your wide tooth comb
- Never force the comb through your hair
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Karpas: Is the bitter herb, it represents a sign of gratitude to God for the goodness of earth, for bread and food. The bitter herb is a mixture of Salt Water & parsley, sometimes other veggies are used like celery. This is also symbolic of the bitterness Israel endured in its experience of slavery.
Unleaven bread: Unleavened bread is the bread the Israelites ate in Egypt. The bread was simple for poor Israelites to make because its easy to prepare and has no yeast.
Grape juice: Instead of wine grape juice is used because in Exodus there are four stages by which Israel was delivered from slavery. Grape juice is symbolic of the blood the Hebrews sprinkled on their doorposts so that first-born sons would be passed over. Participants in the meal also recalled the ten plagues on Egypt by sprinkling ten drops of juice on their plates.
Lamb and egg: The Lamb at a seder meal because is a reminder of the lamb and egg that were offered at the Temple of Jerusalem during the Passover festival.
Elijah's cup: A single large cup and an empty chair are left for the arrival of the prophet Elijah, who is seen as a precursor of the Messiah. It serves as a reminder of those who perished at the Pharaoh's hand in Egypt. Christians believe that John the Baptist has already played the role of Elijah, and in the Christian Seder meal, a seat is left open for Jesus to return. In both cases, the empty chair and extra cup symbolize hope in the coming of the kingdom of God.
Monday, April 6, 2009
OMG you’re going natural or you’re thinking of going natural!! What an exciting time for you! This is the beginning of a new start for you not just your hair. Transitioning is not just a physical transition it is also a spiritual transition. Your faith in your self and patience to deal with two textures of hair will be tested daily. Some days you will love your hair and there will be days when you want to slap a perm in ASAP. Be strong, don’t give in, and remember why you made the decision to go natural. Here are a few tips to remember while you are transitioning:
BE PATIENT hair doesn’t watching your hair grow is like watching paint dry.
Wear protective hairstyles like braids, sew-in weaves, roller sets, etc. the less your hands are in your hair the better. It will help with breakage in the long run.
MOISTURIZE & CONDITION!!! Moisturizing and conditioning are key to keep your hair from breakage and being dry.
Always wear a silk scarf or bonnet to bed. I know that bonnets and scarves aren’t the sexiest bedroom attire, but they will protect your hair.
STAY AWAY FROM HEAT!!! Flat Irons, curling irons, & blow dryers should be used very little. If you do choose to go with a straight look make sure you are not using heat every day and wear a straight style maybe once a month.
There will be breakage, but don’t panic at the site of strands in the comb. Your hair will break where the natural and relaxed hair meets because that area is weak. Unless you’re brave enough to just cut it all off!!
Deep condition with a moisturizing conditioner once a week and with a protein conditioner once a month, Conditioning is very important to your hair.
Be Encouraged no matter what people say. Some of us will face some nasty comments or discouraging comments, but that’s with everything you do in life. You are the one who has to wear your hair not other people.
Last but not least have fun. Transitioning doesn’t have to be boring there are numerous styles available for everybody’s taste.
Good luck & be blessed
Sunday, April 5, 2009
I called Eden bodyworks to see if there was some where else I could purchase their products but I got no answer and it went to a voicemail. I was really looking forward to reviewing the products this weekend. Well I think I'm gonna have to order them from online now. So, the review will have to wait.
However; I did take small field trip to L'Occitane and I was very pleased with their products and how they are big on using ingredients that are sold and grown Fair trade. L'Occitane products are on medium to high end price range and are great if you feel like splurging on something nice for yourself.